You are crashing through the humid jungles of the Amazon, in search of the answer to the ultimate question. Your foot snags in a treacherous tangle of roots that sends you sprawling to the flourishing jungle floor. But, despite becoming bogged down in a veritable bounty of flora and fauna, you struggle to your feet and forge onward. You are almost there! You shall soon find your answer and reveal to the world who exactly would win in a match between the Hulk and Darth Vader! But you round the next thick outcropping of vegetation only to find...
The Book of Answers has been stolen and, if that weren't bad enough, you also discover that I am posting this in lieu of an actual journal entry! Oh, the Drama, the Despair!

But here it goes anyway- The Question Meme Generator A.K.A The Thing You Should Go Try Right NOW
( [link] )

There are several nice things about this particular meme. One is the random questions it throws your way, another is the fact that it will fill in any slots that you are simply to lazy to fill out yourself.

That said, I proceeded to allow it to autofill all ten of my slots thus creating the following monstrosity.

1. Oh no, a poet got kidnapped by aliens! What do you say once they get back?
Why didn’t you bring me along??? Jerk.

2. Who is Snape's best friend?
I am. He writes me frequently. Last week he sent me a batch of cookies Dumbledore had baked in the hopes I might send them along to L who is not dead but visiting with Santa at the North Pole until the whole Death Note business blows over.

3. If Dreamworks played in a movie, what kind of character would they play?
A Pink Elephant?

4. Have you ever been in your distant relative's house?
No. Just no.

5. Does Napoleon Dynamite have any pets?
I wouldn’t know- I hardly know the guy.

6. Do you miss a comedian?
No, he was never very funny anyway.

7. Would you open a mystery gift Wonder Woman just gave you, without much hesitation?
I would have Superman check it out for me first- just in case.

8. What's Snape's opinion on cheese?
It depends on the flavor- I imagine he’s more of a Munster person.

9. If your sibling and Napoleon Dynamite teamed up, what would they most likely accomplish?
Nothing. They’re both utterly incompitant.

10. What is a not so sexy stranger's favorite TV show or movie?
I have to admit that I have never asked him but Not So Sexy Stranger doesn’t seem to have a great taste in shows so I’ll go ahead and say “Super Mario Super Show”. In any case, you can ask him yourself next time you see him instead of bothering me about it.